( imagined you saw me ) (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
imaginedyou) wrote2005-02-06 01:49 am
imaginedyou) wrote2005-02-06 01:49 am
Entry tags:
cross the line, redefine [30STM, Jared/Shannon]
title: cross the line, redefine
fandom: 30stm
pairing: jared/shannon
summary: “it was genetic, shannon said. blood calling to blood, like to like.”
-
It was genetic, Shannon said. Blood calling to blood, like to like. It was just something in your DNA that made you attracted, something you both shared that made you want each other. You both felt that way, you both had the same parents, it was definitely a family thing.
Yeah, it was some defect in your genes that made you open your legs for your brother.
-
It was an addiction, you knew. It was something you couldn't go for days without. You needed him like you needed air; that constant breathing in you didn't really remember you were doing, that cycle you kept indulging in subconsciously. You would break out in sweat and shake when you hadn't had your fix, your mouth on his, and his skin on yours. Your eyes would sting and your throat would go dry so you wouldn't forget how he tasted.
It was something in both of you, some substance that made you dependant on one another until you couldn't even sleep in separate beds.
-
It was rebellion. It was the childish part inside you that wanted to do everything you had ever been told was bad and wrong and dangerous and unacceptable. The child who had looked behind closed doors and played with things they weren't supposed to have touched. Had seen lean, bare muscle round a bathroom door, had touched chest and thigh and crotch. It just wasn't right to have such feelings for someone of the same gender as you, to the majority. Not natural. And it was disgusting to want and need someone of your own family that way.
But you'd always been the ones to go against the grain as kids. You'd always wanted to prove them all wrong and see the looks on their faces.
-
It was fashion. It was en Vogue to be friendly, familiar, loving, to family and strangers alike. It was commonplace to hug on greeting, and kiss both cheeks. It was just the way life was now, to accept it as corrupt as it was, the way no-one could be shocked or surprised by debauchery anymore, and would settle to pretend peace and love and joy to all instead. You were just going along with the flow, and perhaps indulging a little more than you should've been.
It was the thrill of being caught up in the times and what was hot that caught you up in familiar bed sheets, and warm breath on your neck reminding you Shannon was hot.
-
It was a cry for help, the therapist related. It was a scream out, saying that so much of the affection that should come from parents and siblings was being denied, that you had both overcompensated with the one blood relation you could both rely on. You had both put all your trust and faith into each other, and felt bound together, so that you weren't letting yourselves be open to love or affection from anyone else, let alone likely to escape this mess by those means.
It was the two of you saying you needed aid, not that you woke up in the comfort of someone who knew everything without having to ever be told.
-
It was lust, pure and simple. It was spoken in disapproving frowns and dirty looks as the two of you walked down the street hand in hand. It had been a spur of the moment event, a wildly blunderous mistake, and neither of you had had the sense to step outside and simply look elsewhere to satisfy your yearnings. It had been dirty, animal lust that had blinded you to anything but the feelings in the moment, and perhaps you were still unable to see clearly what exactly you were doing.
It was lust, lust they said. But they were wrong.
-
fandom: 30stm
pairing: jared/shannon
summary: “it was genetic, shannon said. blood calling to blood, like to like.”
-
It was genetic, Shannon said. Blood calling to blood, like to like. It was just something in your DNA that made you attracted, something you both shared that made you want each other. You both felt that way, you both had the same parents, it was definitely a family thing.
Yeah, it was some defect in your genes that made you open your legs for your brother.
-
It was an addiction, you knew. It was something you couldn't go for days without. You needed him like you needed air; that constant breathing in you didn't really remember you were doing, that cycle you kept indulging in subconsciously. You would break out in sweat and shake when you hadn't had your fix, your mouth on his, and his skin on yours. Your eyes would sting and your throat would go dry so you wouldn't forget how he tasted.
It was something in both of you, some substance that made you dependant on one another until you couldn't even sleep in separate beds.
-
It was rebellion. It was the childish part inside you that wanted to do everything you had ever been told was bad and wrong and dangerous and unacceptable. The child who had looked behind closed doors and played with things they weren't supposed to have touched. Had seen lean, bare muscle round a bathroom door, had touched chest and thigh and crotch. It just wasn't right to have such feelings for someone of the same gender as you, to the majority. Not natural. And it was disgusting to want and need someone of your own family that way.
But you'd always been the ones to go against the grain as kids. You'd always wanted to prove them all wrong and see the looks on their faces.
-
It was fashion. It was en Vogue to be friendly, familiar, loving, to family and strangers alike. It was commonplace to hug on greeting, and kiss both cheeks. It was just the way life was now, to accept it as corrupt as it was, the way no-one could be shocked or surprised by debauchery anymore, and would settle to pretend peace and love and joy to all instead. You were just going along with the flow, and perhaps indulging a little more than you should've been.
It was the thrill of being caught up in the times and what was hot that caught you up in familiar bed sheets, and warm breath on your neck reminding you Shannon was hot.
-
It was a cry for help, the therapist related. It was a scream out, saying that so much of the affection that should come from parents and siblings was being denied, that you had both overcompensated with the one blood relation you could both rely on. You had both put all your trust and faith into each other, and felt bound together, so that you weren't letting yourselves be open to love or affection from anyone else, let alone likely to escape this mess by those means.
It was the two of you saying you needed aid, not that you woke up in the comfort of someone who knew everything without having to ever be told.
-
It was lust, pure and simple. It was spoken in disapproving frowns and dirty looks as the two of you walked down the street hand in hand. It had been a spur of the moment event, a wildly blunderous mistake, and neither of you had had the sense to step outside and simply look elsewhere to satisfy your yearnings. It had been dirty, animal lust that had blinded you to anything but the feelings in the moment, and perhaps you were still unable to see clearly what exactly you were doing.
It was lust, lust they said. But they were wrong.
-
no subject
dirtynice thoughts*i go through stages thinking jarshan *shrugs* not that special, but then you write them like this all clinging and desperate and i find myself eeping wanting more
*uses jarshan icon specially* ;)
no subject
I suppose that's where we differ; I always see them as I write them, like this, so I always love 'em :D But hey it's nice to renew your love of them too!
N'awww jarshan icon yay!
no subject
"Yeah, it was some defect in your genes that made you open your legs for your brother. "
out of my head *stares and gnuhs* how can a sentence be all *shiveryraar*
no subject
And dude, have you not read your own fic? Eevrything you write has one of those lines, sentences you cant get past or read without being all meep and shivery and have to read over and over, and read the whole thing just to see the sentence in context and flow and get hit by it all over again...!